The 15 Funniest “Yo Mama” Jokes from Harry Potter

These “yo mama” jokes are so funny, they may almost be considered magical.

The books were read by you. You’ve seen the films. You may even have enjoyed a few amusing Harry Potter parody films on YouTube. But over all these years, something has been lacking.

Why weren’t crude slurs exchanged amid all this wizard-on-wizard combat? Here, we’re not discussing a dearth of smart conversation; rather, we’re discussing sheer, unadulterated trash talk. What better way to humiliate your magical adversaries than with a classic “Yo Mama” joke?

You don’t need to look any farther because we have this obvious omission covered. Use one of these bad boy “You Mama” jokes the next time you’re going wand-to-wand with a jerkface like Draco Malfoy and watch his lower lip start to tremble. Malfoy, eat snails!

Yo mama’s so fat…

She tried to eat Cornelius Fudge. 

“In her defense, he does sound delicious.” — Aunt Marge.

Even the Dementors can’t suck out her soul in one sitting.

“Okay, that was good. That’s a good one. Even I laughed, and I’m the most evil being, well, ever.” – Voldemort.

Yo mama’s so poor…

She went to Honeydukes and put a chocolate frog on layaway!

Damn, that’s cold.

Yo mama is very dumb

She thought that she could talk to snakes if she put parsley on her tongue.

Get it, parsley tongue?  Parseltongue? Sigh… 

“Dumb, you say? Why don’t you come over HERE and say that to me?” -Mrs. Molly Weasley, resident bad ass mama.

Yo mother is huge.

The sorting hat put her in ALL FOUR houses. 

“EFFFFFFFF…YOUUUU.” – Harry Potter.

Yo mama’s so Muggle…

The Sorting Hat didn’t put her in a house, he put her in an economy studio apartment.

“Oh, I suppose that’s funny because I’m half Muggle? Well… that’s mean.” *runs off crying*  — Hermione Granger

Your mother is very foolish.

She thinks Patronus is a kind of Tequila.

“Bwahaha, I’ll drink to that!” – Sirius Black.

Yooo Mama’s so old

She used to babysit Dumbledore.

“Gah! What kind of dark magic is this? Even I, the Potions Master, am unfamiliar with these stinging and burning sensations.” – Professor Snape.

When she goes looking for the room of requirement she finds a McDonald’s.

“I don’t understand. No really, I don’t get it.” – Professor Trelawney.

Yoo mama’s so fat

She looked in the Mirror of Erised and saw a ham.

“Mum’s gonna kill me if she finds out I laughed at this joke.” – Ron Weasley.

• 
  Holiday Humor

By 

Lukas Kaiser

Updated on 06/25/19

You’ve read the books. You’ve watched the movies. Maybe you’ve even watched a few funny Harry Potter spoof videos on YouTube. Yet one thing has been missing all these years….

With all this wizard-on-wizard fighting, why were there no childish insults thrown around? We’re not talking about a lack of witty banter here; we’re talking pure, straight-up, unadulterated trash talk. What better way is there to insult your magical foes than with a good old-fashioned “Yo Mama” joke?

Look no further, because we’ve got this glaring omission covered. Next time you’re going wand-to-wand with a jerkface like Draco Malfoy, whip out one of these bad boy “You Mama” jokes and watch his lower lip start to quiver. Eat slugs, Malfoy!

Yo mama’s so fat…

 She tried to eat Cornelius Fudge. 

“In her defense, he does sound delicious.” — Aunt Marge.

Yo mama’s so fat…

Even the Dementors can’t suck out her soul in one sitting.

“Okay, that was good. That’s a good one. Even I laughed, and I’m the most evil being, well, ever.” – Voldemort.

Yo mama’s so poor…

She went to Honeydukes and put a chocolate frog on layaway!

Damn, that’s cold.

Yo mama’s so dumb…

She thought that she could talk to snakes if she put parsley on her tongue.

Get it, parsley tongue?  Parseltongue? Sigh… 

“Dumb, you say? Why don’t you come over HERE and say that to me?” -Mrs. Molly Weasley, resident bad ass mama.

Yo mama’s so big…

The sorting hat put her in ALL FOUR houses. 

“EFFFFFFFF…YOUUUU.” – Harry Potter.

Yo mama’s so Muggle…

The Sorting Hat didn’t put her in a house, he put her in an economy studio apartment.

“Oh, I suppose that’s funny because I’m half Muggle? Well… that’s mean.” *runs off crying*  — Hermione Granger

Yo mama’s so stupid…

She thinks Patronus is a kind of Tequila.

“Bwahaha, I’ll drink to that!” – Sirius Black.

Recommended: 12 Funny Web Memes That Made Us LOL in 2015.

Yo mama’s so old…

She used to babysit Dumbledore.

“Gah! What kind of dark magic is this? Even I, the Potions Master, am unfamiliar with these stinging and burning sensations.” – Professor Snape.

Yo mama’s so fat…

When she goes looking for the room of requirement she finds a McDonald’s.

“I don’t understand. No really, I don’t get it.” – Professor Trelawney.

You mama’s so fat…

She looked in the Mirror of Erised and saw a ham.

“Mum’s gonna kill me if she finds out I laughed at this joke.” – Ron Weasley.

Next Page: Even more funny Harry Potter Yo Mama jokes!

Yo mama’s so ugly…

When she walked into Gringotts Wizarding Bank, they gave her a job application.   

“You’re talking about my mother? Ya’ shouldn’t’a done that.” – Hagrid.

She joined the Death Eaters cuz she was hungry.

“Is this the sort of thing that passes for humor, Mr. Potter?” – Professor McGonagall. 

The sorting hat assigned her to the House of Pancakes.  

“Very amusing, but what is this House of Pancakes you speak of, and where can I find one?” – Mad Eye Moody.

Every pair of her panties has the Dark Mark.

“You know the Death Eaters drove my mother mad, don’t you? Harsh, dude.That is harsh.” – Neville Longbottom.

The Dementor’s Kiss was swapped out for a hearty handshake and a promise to give her a call sometime.

BURRRRRRRN! Drop the mic, Seamus; you win this round.

Via Warner Brothers/Universal.